OK, Don’t Freak. But, Have You Seen Them Too?

So, in our walks around the home hood, we’ve been seeing Little People. I think they are watching us.

Truth be told, I started noticing them after watching the movie 4th Kind. Have you seen it? No? Don’t. Well, Do, but only if you are man enough to handle it. I’m man enough (stop staring at my new hair cut). I love a good Alien story, a good tale of a haunting, and the idea of clairvoyant people is really intriguing. That movie kind of freaked me out though. Then, in walking around Wallyhood, me and the familia started seeing them.

                 This was the first one we noticed. I think it was Niamh that saw him. She thought he was cute. She’s just a kid, what does she know. He’s creepy.

There is this guy. Hanging around the bar. Is he working for the police?

   They are everywhere.

 

 

 

 

HA HA HA HA HA!

Did you really think that there are little ceramic gnomes out there spying on you?

Sheesh. That’s so silly.

Naw, this is the doing of Steve and his Minions. Steve went to Target, bought a bunch of figurines and came up with the idea of placing them around town where we take our walks. That way, we can look for them when we are out and about and need a quick distraction during a melt down because, well, because there are countless reasons why N and F melt down. None of them make sense to us rational people.

Cute idea, huh? Look out for them when you are around our neck of the woods….they’ll be looking out for you.

A Tale of Two Bikes, A Love Story

 

I wish I could make up a cute little story starring two bikes but that’s just not my thing.  Here’s the real story, it isn’t cute, but it has a good ending.

10.5 years ago, I met Steve. I had a bike. I spent $600 on it, I think. I thought it was a super high end bike because it cost $600, I think. When I moved from San Francisco to Seattle for Nursing School, I sold my car to help pay for tuition (poor poor Fiona). That money didn’t last very long but I had my bike (and the bus) to get me around town. I rode my bike from Queen Anne to Seattle U most days for class. I thought I was an avid rider.

10.5 years ago, I met Steve. He had a bike. He also had a Jeep that was in for repairs. Steve lived in Wedgewood, his Jeep was being repaired in Capit0l Hill. He needed to get his Jeep from the shop early one morning. He was going to ride his bike (btw his bike cost about $600 x 5). Trying to flirt with him, I offered to drive him to get his bike. “Oh, no, you can’t ride all the way to Capital Hill, I’ll come over early and drive you.” (for those following from outside the Seattle Area, we’re talking a 6 mile drive/ride.)  He declined the offer, and probably laughed at me. Not too long after that, I realized that Steve was like a REAL bike rider, something they call “Cyclist”. He did 100 mile rides (and I stood on a street corner with an orange flag for my girlfriend share of those rides).

Ok, cut to the chase….at some point, Steve alluded to the idea that maybe people who really ride bikes, like more than 1.3 miles a day, were out there making fun of me on my Rockhopper. So, I left my bike locked in the basement of The Union Arms Apartment building and never rode it again. I don’t like people making fun of me, I don’t even like the idea of it. Its probably still there. If any readers are currently living there, the combo is 2-4-6. (Steve also told me I was wearing Mom Jeans recently. It was the first time I wore those jeans, just had them hemmed to my measurements. I’ll never wear them again.)

Sooooooo, for 10.5 years, I have been with a “Cyclist”. This “Cyclist” has worked for THREE bike companies in the 10.5 years I have known him. Guess how long he has been promising to get me a new bike. Anyone? Anyone? (cricket cricket)                  TEN POINT FIVE YEARS, that’s how long.

For Mother’s Day, he made good on his promise. I now have a really pretty bike that was supposed to come with some really really cool features but The UPS truck smashed the headlight, the speedometer won’t turn on, a fender was broken in 2, and the saddle bag was missing from the box. Oh well.

OMG, this is becoming a long story. OK, let’s wrap it up here.

Today, Steve and I pretended we were a couple that just started dating and does not have any kids (or laundry, or dishes, or bathrooms). We rode our bikes down to Green Lake and lunched at the Green Lake Pub. It was Heaven. Here are our photos.

He looks genuinely happy, doesn’t he?

Steve said I don’t need to wear a helmet because my new haircut makes it look like I’m always wearing one. He really did say that. Meanie.

 

I L O V E beer. In particular, Hefeweizen.

 

She’s pretty. I’m gonna call her “George”.

A Picture is Worth 1000 Words

I have no words.

So, When is Children’s Day?

Oh, Niamh, my Niamh. When Niamh realized I would be getting the attention and gifts today, she wanted to know “when is Children’s Day?” And, what is the overwhelming answer? “Everyday is Children’s Day”, can’t I have a day to myself?

We had such a, dare I say it, perfect day. Started (I won’t tell you what time because I don’t want anyone to get jealous or think that I am an awful mother) with swim lessons. Finn told me that because it is Mothers Day, he would put his head under water for 5 minutes. Buddy, while there are some days I would swear that having my kids' underwater for 5 minutes would be MY saving grace, I think that you promising to fulfill that wish {which I only have in moments of desperation and sleeplessness and I haven’t had in many many months} is really too much to ask of you.  However, Niamh actually submerged herself for THE FIRST TIME at swim lessons today. That really was a gift because, Niamh, My Dear Safe un-Daredevil, you are the oldest and tallest {and scrawniest} in your class by at least 2 years and 6 inches {and 5 lbs}, and I feared that all the 3 year olds would continue to pass Tadpoles and you would be there until your Elementary School Graduation. I now have hope that your swimsuit won’t be retired with your ballet slippers, gymnastics leotard, and soccer cleats. {sigh}.

 

Next on the agenda was brunch at Szmania’s in Magnolia. We felt fancy just crossing the bridge in to Magnolia. We didn’t quite bring our best manners with us from Wallyhood, but we did bring our appetites.

Will someone please mess up my hair in the next few photos? I look like the dude on the Little Caesars Pizza box.

 

Finn ate: pancakes, eggs, muffin, scone, strawberries, 2 yogurts, potatoes, chicken strip, my halibut, my asparagus, my potatoes, and juice. He visited the bathroom twice.

Niamh ate: a pancake, a strawberry, a yogurt, and juice. How does she keep that girlish figure, I just don’t know.

I’ll get back to this.

After digesting for all of 45 minutes, Steve’s Mom, Brother, and his family met at our house for ice cream. We did somersaults and cartwheels all the way to Molly Moon’s. Kinda disappointed nobody captured my perfect 10 on film.

 

Mother’s Day is no day off from Mom duties. Kids still need their pants buttoned.

 

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, our destination. FYI, Sasquatch is TO DIE FOR. Totally worth the 8 billion calories.

Oblivious to the dog about to eat her in one bite, Niamh takes advantage of the camera being on her alone.

Cousin Emily, Niamh, and Finn in front of the Castlereach Apartments. Who would have known this building existed, nestled in between M. Moon’s and Issian Restaurant if they didn’t have 30 minutes in an ice cream line to kill. Quite a nice teal green frames the door. Reminds me of a Pub entrance in my ancestors’ homeland (Eire). Agreed?

Don’t look discouraged, Finn, ice cream is coming soon.

Steve took advantage of the time in line to practice his self-portrait skillz.

 

YAY!!!!!!!!!!! Starburst! Finn was starving after eating just a light lunch earlier in the day.

More tumbling on the way home.

And now, this……

4 years ago, we moved in to this old house. The power outlet I use most often, the one I connect the vacuum to at least twice each day, was loose. I cursed {Steve’s name} every day when the cord would pull out of the wall because the outlet was loose after 90 years of use. Steve has been promising me he would replace it for years. “It only takes a couple of minutes.” So, why, WHY, Why did it take 4 years to do? {As he sits next to me he says, “because I had to turn the power off”. Do you know how many times we have turned the power off around here for one project or another? Me neither, but its a lot. Lame excuse, Buddy.} So, THIS power outlet is the best Mother’s Day gift ever. Tomorrow, there is a fancy bike coming for me in the mail. I think I’m going to really like it because it comes with accessories and a big fat cushy seat for my big fat cushy rear end. But, I really think that I am going to appreciate this power outlet for many years to come.

Happy Mothers Day.

Love,

Fiona.

All or Nothing….

That’s what I told my little sister when she asked me if I could go short in stages. “All or nothing,” I said. “Go big or go home,” she responded.

So, why did I do it? Or, to quote so many people when they see my new do for the first time “What possessed you to do such a thing?” Using the word “possessed” suggests I was not of right mind when I decided that this was going to be my new look. Well, my reasons were plenty. These are just a few.

1. I wanted to lose a few lbs and this seemed the quickest way.      2. I’m in the witness protection program.                                                3. Fairies Rock.                                                                                                        4. I slept with gum in my mouth and woke up with it stuck in my hair.                                                                                                                               5. The Keebler Elves were holding auditions.                                             6. I was tired of getting confused with Demi Moore and Courtney Cox.                                                                                                                                7. I passed out on the couch and woke up to Niamh and Finn standing over me with a pair of scissors each. Their smiles were brief.                                                                                                                              8. I wanted to see who my real friends are.

Below are a few snaps of the approach Chloe took to make my dream of looking like the Molly Moon’s Ice Cream Scooper come true.

First, I got some bangs.

Next, an 80’s Rocker Mullet

Then, a version of a bowl cut.

And the final product after I left the salon, went home to change in to my Scrubs, and before I had to run off to work where friends and coworkers made me sweat because of the crowd that formed around me to gasp and gawk and point at me. Really, I could have used about a week off to get used to it before being seen in public.  Its becoming less of a shock to catch my reflection in glass now.

Still, it will be a while before I will be comfortable wearing green again.